Sixty-eight days have passed since I moved to my new home in a secluded village surrounded by farmland, nature, roe deer, and wild boar. This action is one of the most significant at the beginning of this "new life," or at least quite disruptive, and it has certainly brought new experiences, but here's the most shocking one for me:

I'm no longer allergic.

I suppose this story begins around the age of twelve, when I went through a terrible period in the spring. I was diagnosed with a allergy...

There was a time when I really enjoyed diving headfirst into the cold water in the summer. Unlike others, it wasn't a taste I acquired during childhood; rather, this practice became relevant in my early adult life, when I started running competently.

It wasn't uncommon for me to time my run during August to coincide with the time my mother would go for her two-kilometer swim in the swimming pool where we lived. I suppose that in a way, this was one of the small gestures that built a close relationship....

What I tried to read in https://cyberspace.online/notbornval/valerias-funeral

Whenever I think about death, I remember my friend the Turriptosis dohrnii, or moon jellyfish, which can live indefinitely. When it outlives its sexual maturity, it can revert to a sexually immature age through a cellular development process called… yes, transdifferentiation.

So, the moon jellyfish certainly doesn't plan its funeral. According to Wikipedia, a funeral...

Dancing with swords

The videos:

• https://notbornval.com/video/notbornval/mascaramuerteroja1.mp4
• https://notbornval.com/video/notbornval/mascaramuerteroja2.mp4

There's a lot I could say about this. It's not that I think we've redefined the entertainment world or anything like that, but from a personal perspective, in relation to my gender identity and other paradigms,...

The Complementary Void

It's not exactly an established definition, but I call the complementary void that space where someone should be, but isn't, for whatever reason. If they had never been there, it would be a regular void like any other, and nothing would happen. But because the person existed, their subsequent absence is noticeable, probably painful, or at least awakens certain feelings that aren't always discussed.

The obvious case of a complementary void occurs with the death of a person, and...

The game is to create a title and synopsis for a gangster movie with anachronistic swords.

My Useless Skills

I've been thinking about my skills in order to prepare for my future and my new life, and I've realized that I'm rather not suited to the context of our hyper-specialized society. Almost everything I can do (except, I suppose, programming) is essentially useless:

• Sword fighting: I've invested so much time in this that I could have gotten a university degree instead. Of course, that doesn't mean the degree is useful either.
• Endless aerobics: I can run 10 km at a 4-minute...

My new town.

"Matarrubia" can be translated as "kill-a-blonde-girl".

I have a blonde wig, and also two handed swords. I'm ready.

This night I had a lucid dream. I didn't have a lot in my life, and all of them was about relevant conversations with my dead mother, or with the... janitor of the matrix...

But this one had no revelations, just freedom and fun.

So first I changed my genitals into a full female set. I thought it would be nice to test it... but I wanted to fly! And I could, strong and fast but with limits: I did lost speed when I went up, and needed to...

I now have a dotanuki, yay! I've already written a bit about it recently, but I think the subject deserves another paragraph or two. Maybe a couple of pages. It'll be short. Well, maybe not short enough… but at least I'll divide it into sections.

Part One: No sword is such as popular.

I don't think there's a weapon with as much associated mystique as katanas. The stories that spread misinformation, exaggerations, and legends have not only crossed all territorial borders and boarded multiple artistic...

“I call home any place where there’s a nail to hang my raincoat and knife.”

It’s an old naval saying that has always impressed me, and while it’s a bit exaggerated, it certainly speaks to a nomadic and unstable lifestyle in which the individual reflects on what is strictly necessary around which they can build a decent existence.

Almost everyone I know seems aligned with the idea of ​​having something to call “home.” A reasonably comfortable, everyday, and definitely stable environment to which...

More than just dancing

I remember when I started my transition journey, I loved going out dancing. It was practically the only thing I did, because I was absolutely terrified of doing anything else, like getting gas or buying bread.

It's amazing how much progress you can make when you just do things. Now, not only can I get gas or buy bread as Valeria, but I've even managed to buy a house and the subsequent renovations, among many other things... like going out dancing. I still really enjoy dancing;...

Graphene in my Hand!

In this phase of my cyberpunk life, stuck in a city, I've acquired enough stability to aboard small projects lasting just a few days—enough to distract me from my situation, but not enough to hold me back for too long.

I thought having a mobile phone free from corporate influence would fall into this category, but the truth is, it's been disappointingly easy.

How did I get here?

My masculine personality did its best to stay out of the control of national and foreign...

Lately, I'M feeling really overwhelmed.

I suppose there are a few reasons for this, given the instability of my current situation. I have no idea what my fate holds, nor how the destruction of so many of the anchors of my existence up to this point will affect me.

But even from the hazy confusion of someone like me, who lives in constant episodes of dissociative identity disorder, I can find some light and extract useful information because… because I'm not an idiot. So I can navigate through the...

Hello, cyberians. Trans cyberpunk warrior here asking for your help.

Don't worry, I'm not asking for money, but for advice, or even simple ideas.

My house is being sold, and with it, the last remnant of my past. It's a difficult situation, but also an opportunity to start a new life. So, if I enter in the typical flux "buy other house, get a work..." I will probably miss my last chance in this life to do something different.

Summarizing my last content:

-...

I think I'm getting somewhere, both in these short texts about my crossroad and at the crossroad itself. In any case, I can't cover my strange life in its entirety, and although I've already written about my abilities and the milestones I've achieved with them, there are also many negative things that can be said about me.

I think it all comes from the fact that I really hate the world I live in. It's not that I think "past was better", but I certainly find the present deeply repulsive, and because of...

Some people say I love nature. I think there's a reason for that, because I've spent my whole life in a rural village (even though I worked in a big city). I have enough knowledge, I've train skills, but I wouldn't say I love nature. I respect nature: it tried to kill me too many times.

I know I wouldn't want to live in a city. I like being able to leave my house and see no one, I like doing outdoor activities, I like being able to go running in completely empty places, and very occasionally nature gifts...

I don't know if I am a violent person or not: I am used to dealing with aggressive situations, but I never react with anger. I think my father was the opposite: he hated violence but always reacted with anger.

My parents always raised me to be a peaceful person, but I always wanted war toys, or at least toys with little swords. This may be unusual for a transgender person, so perhaps my gender identity is a little unusual.

At fifteen, I got tired of being the weak one. Although I lived in an...

I think you could say I'm a creative person. I've always been interested in writing my own stories and have participated in lots of artistic activities. In fact, when I was 16, I wrote my first novel while my teachers were trying to make me conform to the education system.

I started taking it seriously around 2005, when I began writing not only novels but also role-playing games, which led to co-participations such as “Black Sword” and “Fragile.”...

Dealing with my damaged perception of pleasure

I shared here in other posts I had (probably) depression and dissociative disorder. As a cause or effect, I also have trouble enjoying things formerly I liked.

Lastly I can't get hooked enough to play a video game for more than 30 minutes, and the same thing happens to me with most movies.

It also doesn't help that modern art has succumbed to consumer trends that promote models I don't really like by themselves.

And, you know... why to play a videogame...