I think I'm getting somewhere, both in these short texts about my crossroad and at the crossroad itself. In any case, I can't cover my strange life in its entirety, and although I've already written about my abilities and the milestones I've achieved with them, there are also many negative things that can be said about me.

I think it all comes from the fact that I really hate the world I live in. It's not that I think "past was better", but I certainly find the present deeply repulsive, and because of that, I don't fit in, nor do I try to.

It is extremely difficult for me, if not impossible, to have a partner. In fact, the thinking of intimacy with another human being is mainly invasive to me. My very particular gender identity and dissociation issues make me really hard to deal with.

Similarly, I have great difficulty holding down a job working for someone else. My gender identity is already a problem, but my evident contempt for all authority (often stupid) causes all kinds of problems, sometimes unsolvable ones.

For the same reason, I have problems with spaces where individual freedom is severely limited, usually in the pretext of security. Because of this, I never travel by plane or train, although I have no problem driving long distances.