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I was listening to Harvey from Her's today, and scrolled through the comments
"Death has excellent taste in music"
And I had to walk away for a bit
It's so god damn unfair, for a comment to put into words what I felt while simultaneously feeling as if I've been mocked. Because death does have excellent taste in music. Why else would all these wonderful and talented artists who created out of love be taken? And sometimes I find it hard to believe that's not the case
I didn't think packing to move would be this emotionally intensive
I think I've been denying the reality that I'd have to start at time point, and now that I've started, I can't deny it anymore
It hurts. It hurts a lot. We won't even be that far away, we're in the same neighborhood, literally within walking distance, but the years I've spent in this room, they won't be here anymore. This room is quite literally on borrowed time, it doesn't feel like the space I'm in belongs to me anymore. I wonder how...
Dreams are made up of our individual experiences. What we've felt, what we've seen, what we've touched. And I do not have many.
So I need to find more. See more of the world, feel more things, so that my dreams can be as flavorful as I know myself to be. Or at least, I can recognize the potential within myself to be.
I TOOK A SHOWER!!1!11!
YIPPEE :D
Tagged as NSFW for a reason
I'm a findom, I have my specific niche. Tonight would have me acting outside that niche. I do have an interest in whatever lays ahead of me, but it could mark the difference between secure income for the foreseeable future
The ideal situation is I have a real job and findom acts as a side gig, but that's not possible for me right now. Banking my future on something like this has me feeling anxious enough that it will most certainly impact how well I do
Ahhhh
Starting out...
I was doing my usual thing, sitting at my desk with my computer, and I noticed something funny with my eyes
It was like there was a blind spot that wasn't supposed to be there. Then a part of my vision became wavy. There was a sharp semicircle, I could clearly trace where it was if I could overlay my vision onto paper, and it was making everything along that line fuzzy
Shortly after, I had a migraine
This is the first time I accurately felt like something not good would come after. I've had times...
Hot take, "friendslop" games are the board games of the modern age
We buy them to play with our friends, and when we've had our fun, they sit on the "shelf" for a while until we decide to play them again
They're a reason to bring friends together
Thinking about how it all was back then, while I was wishing for that future frutiger aero showed me, these thoughts came to me
One day we will look back and remember these games fondly. I already think of them as board games, and people don't consider...
So there I was, thinking about something, and then it led to cyberspace, about how cool it is that we have a space where we can just say things and have it be read by other people with no expectation to follow up if you don't feel like it, and how much it would suck if it became something like Twitter, where people let their ego and need to be right dictate the words being typed
And then I thought, surely Genghis wouldn't allow that to happen, right?
Anyway, Bisquick has been ruined for me, when I smell...
I've heard of a little corner on the internet named KamTube
I have an idea for what I want to put up there
I'm a singer, I love to sing, but my range isn't the widest, so I can only sing small bits of the songs I really like
I'm sure if I compromised and chose songs that better fit my range, I could be successful with it, but I don't want to give that up when that's the whole reason why I do it
So I was thinking of compiling most of my little clips into one video and throwing it on there
I'm real...
I do not bring my dirty dish down, make sure it's clean enough for the dishwasher, and put it inside that dishwasher because I like doing dishes
I do all that because it's what I prefer against the alternative, which is dishes piling up, my guilt weighing on me, and having to spend precious time I could've been using doing literally anything else
Time spent feeling like scum is time that isn't mine
So I choose to do the right thing
I know this is going to sound weird, but I promise it becomes wholesome in the end
During February, right around Valentine's Day in fact, I got allergies bad enough that it took courage to move. My skin was sensitive, my muscles ached, my sinuses were messed up. Speaking wasn't something I could comfortably do. As I started feeling better, I wanted to spend some time with one of my closest friends. I didn't feel like I had it in me to maintain a vocal conversation
So my friend muted me.
Not because he...
Making some cheese tots for my lunch today. Something I've noticed is that when I make my normal portion size that I do for an evening instead of noon, I end up feeling full and not making dinner until later and that ends up with me going to bed later as well. So I'm trying something new today.
Reducing the portion I usually make, so that I'll have an appetite for dinner around dinner time :3
I need to do something so I know how to approach some situation
But I'm not confident I will be fully equipped with what I need after doing this something
So here I am after having eaten lunch, anxious over what I have to start, knowing that I need to start it, and yet feeling scared over failure
The button is right there, and pressing it means I'll have taken my first step
I really need material I can study so I know how normal conversations and activities between people happen and work
I was watching an anime named "Tonari no Yokai-san", it's an incredible anime exploring identity and time.
Two characters were talking, and a touchy subject was brought up, followed with "Am I overstepping?" Three simple words show that subject was brought up out of concern for the other, not to antagonize or incite any sort of feeling, and I thought to myself "Wow, if only more people...
Man... I'm gonna miss when AI is dead
Like don't get me wrong, I want it gone, I think generative AI is reprehensible
But there are so many things I don't know how to do, and I want to find out how to do them. I don't have to rely on someone having free time to educate me on something incredibly specific for my use case that might not even be appropriate to be asking about. It's so easy to ask something and for it to tell me exactly what I need to know instead of going through five or six places...
Singing is actually really complicated :I
It's hard to sing because just changing the way your mouth is shaped causes the pitch that comes out to be different
Understanding how you need to adjust your throat to keep the pitch the same no matter how you move between mouth shapes is how you learn to sing
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