I am on my way to a meeting today. I am there as a kind of representative from my own collective. Our collective share an understanding that what the meeting is about is a problem in it self. The fight is lost before engaging with it. The whole project feels like a distraction from shit that will actually get things done in a materially meaningful way. I reeeaaally don't like being in this contrarian position. Being the killjoy in the organizing is such a weird role.